


Maiden Voyage

by Suzie_Shooter



Category: Alex Rider - Anthony Horowitz
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Declarations Of Love, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Oral Sex, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:54:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26542501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Suzie_Shooter/pseuds/Suzie_Shooter
Summary: Written for the kinkmeme prompt: Virgin!Yassen. Yassen never really had the time or chance to sleep with someone. With time it was just easier to not think about it, and being one of the best assassins in the world doesn't exactly leave you with much time for relationships/sex, not to mention it's difficult to find people you could trust. But then Alex happens and oh.
Relationships: Yassen Gregorovich/Alex Rider
Comments: 12
Kudos: 75
Collections: Alex Rider Kinkmeme





	Maiden Voyage

“You’ve done well.” The woman facing them was striking, jet black hair curled over her shoulder, gold sheath dress and discreet but expensive jewellery. Alex’s first thought was that it didn’t look very practical for the middle of the afternoon in the middle of a pseudo-military compound, and then reconsidered. The dress was loose enough not to be restrictive and would certainly be cooler in this climate than what he was currently wearing. And the spike heels looked like titanium. He remembered the odd stab mark they’d found on one of the bodies, and had a brief moment of realisation. Divorce, in this case, had clearly never been an option. 

He could afford to stare because her attention at the moment was very much focussed on Yassen beside him. 

“Very well,” she repeated slowly. “However can I thank you?”

Alex bit down on a smirk, but Yassen just gave her impassive eyes and a polite smile. “By paying us what we are owed?”

Her smile faltered a little. “Perhaps we could discuss it over a drink?”

“My associate and I need to be leaving.”

The smile was gone, and Alex was abruptly highly conscious they were surrounded by a lot of armed men who were paid by her and not them. 

“You should perhaps be more careful not to insult me.”

Alex weighed up the odds of being murdered by a militia versus being murdered by Yassen, and stepped in.

“No offence intended ma’am, he just bats for the other team.”

Alex could feel Yassen staring at him and tried not to wince. 

Her expression rearranged itself. “Oh. I see. How – disappointing.” She at least gave up on the idea of a more hands-on demonstration of gratitude and they found themselves dismissed in short order, although with a very generous payment in full.

Yassen said nothing for the entire drive back to the hotel in La Paz and Alex fidgeted in the passenger seat, unable to tell if he was pissed off or not. 

“I’m sorry,” he blurted finally when they were safely back in their suite and had showered and changed and eaten.

Yassen looked up. “What for?” He sounded genuinely confused, and Alex relaxed a little. Apparently he hadn’t been brooding. It was so fucking hard to tell with Yassen.

“For pretending you were gay. Seriously, you couldn’t just have made nice for a minute? What happened to diplomacy?”

“That’s what I’ve got you for.” Yassen gave him a glimmer of a smile, and Alex snorted. 

“Anyway. Sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry.” Yassen studied him for a second. “It happens to be true, anyway.”

Alex stared at him. “You’re gay?”

“You didn’t know?”

Alex shook his head. “I mean – I’d noticed you never seem to be interested in women. But you never seemed to be interested in men either. I don’t know.” He shrugged. “I hadn’t thought about it.” 

Which was a huge lie, but Yassen didn’t need to know that he’d spent a significant part of the past few years fantasising about him. 

“It doesn’t bother you?” Yassen asked.

“No? Why would it?”

“Just checking.”

“I mean – you know. So am I. Gay, I mean.”

“Yes.”

Alex blinked. “You knew?” 

“Of course.”

“Have you been spying on me?”

“No?” Yassen smiled. “I wouldn’t say spying.” Alex looked indignant, and his smile widened. “There are background checks I would make on anyone I was considering working with. You were no exception. I was mostly concerned with establishing you were no longer working with MI6. The personal information was irrelevant.” 

Alex wasn’t sure he liked being thought of as irrelevant. It also wasn’t terribly good for his self-esteem to think that Yassen had known he was gay all this time and had never so much as given him an appraising look. They’d shared rooms, beds, hell at one point a shower, although that had been outside and they’d been mostly concerned about getting the blood off. Yassen had never so much as glanced at him inappropriately. 

Alex was fairly sure he hadn’t been that discreet himself, which made him wonder guiltily if he’d ever made Yassen uncomfortable. 

“Sorry.”

“What for this time?” Yassen looked like he was having a hard time keeping up with Alex’s mental gymnastics. He was on his third drink and was sitting in the corner of the couch. Yassen never drank while he was working, but he was certainly a lot more relaxed now the mission was over. Alex wouldn’t have said he was sprawled exactly, but his posture was open, one arm along the back of the seat, legs apart, glass in his hand.

It occurred to Alex with a weight of surprise that he was the only person who got to see Yassen like this. The only person Yassen ever let his guard down around.

He came over and sat next to him, perhaps a little closer than he would normally have done. Certainly within reach of Yassen’s arm.

Yassen watched this with a slight air of amusement and Alex let his head fall back. He could feel Yassen’s hand behind him. It didn’t get withdrawn.

“You don’t say much, do you?” Alex sighed.

“I generally find you talk enough for both of us,” Yassen observed, and Alex slapped his leg.

“I never know what you’re thinking.”

“You could always ask.”

Alex looked at him. “Right now I’m busy doing maths.”

“That sounds unlikely.”

“I’m gay. You’re gay. Put the two together, what do you get?”

“Two colleagues perfectly capable of maintaining a professional relationship?” 

Alex gave him a sardonic look, and Yassen smiled. “Why don’t you tell me what answer you appear to have arrived at?” he suggested quietly. 

“I don’t want to – you know. Screw things up. If you’re not interested.”

“Like I said, you could always ask,” Yassen said mildly. 

“Normally I just rely on people making drunken passes at me,” Alex sighed.

“This explains a lot about your dating history.” 

“I thought you said my personal information was irrelevant?”

“It’s possible I was lying.”

Alex snorted with laughter. He also felt a spike of hope growing inside him. “So…?”

Yassen put down his glass. “Alex, I’m old enough to be your father. And we have a somewhat complicated history. I was never going to make a pass at you, drunken or otherwise. I have never deluded myself that you would welcome it.”

Alex considered the implications behind those words. Which were in no way, shape or form saying that Yassen didn’t like him in that way.

“Theoretically. If I made one at you. Would it get me shot?” he ventured. Then wondered if he’d imagined the soft brush of fingers against the back of his head.

“Alex...” Yassen sighed. “I’m not sure that it would be a good idea.”

“Why not?”

Yassen looked at him. “I’m not really one for one-night stands,” he said carefully. 

“Who says I only wanted one night?” Alex shifted closer on the couch, up into his personal space. 

Yassen half-laughed. “Alex – ” 

“Because I was thinking a spring wedding.” 

Yassen gave up and just smiled at him. Alex grinned back, suddenly wildly happy. They hadn’t even kissed yet, but it felt like they had somehow slotted into place together. The comfortable rapport they’d built over the last two years of working together suddenly made a lot more sense in the context of a Yassen who actually liked him back in the same way, even if he’d never said anything. 

“So are you going to kiss me now or what?” Alex murmured.

“I thought you were the one making the passes around here?”

“You haven’t promised not to shoot me yet.”

“I also thought you liked to live dangerously?” 

Alex knew he had a goofy smile on his face and he didn’t care. He leaned in slowly, and brought their mouths together. The first kiss was almost chaste, a soft press of lips, then another, and another, the contact slowly becoming firmer each time, their lips gradually parting against each other. 

At the first flicker of tongue Alex felt Yassen’s arm move from the back of the couch and curl around his shoulders, drawing him in. Alex wrapped his own arms around him and deepened the kiss, feeling things tighten pleasantly low in his belly. 

It was warm, and slow, and in all the times Alex had imagined this he’d never expected Yassen to be quite so tender. He was kissing Alex like he’d been unexpectedly handed something precious and was wary of breaking it, and Alex virtually melted into his arms.

For a long time there was no more talking, just drawn out, softly intense kissing that managed to be languid and heated all at once.

When they finally came up for air Yassen looked dazed and Alex had a blatant erection tenting the crotch of his trousers. 

“Wow.” Alex’s reddened lips moved against Yassen’s cheek in a breathless smile. “Fuck.”

Yassen gave him a rather helpless smile that suggested Alex had effectively summarised what they were both thinking, and reached for his glass.

Alex stole it out of his hand and took a sip for himself, settling himself comfortably in the curve of Yassen’s arm as he handed it back. 

“So, um.” Alex gave him a speculative look. “Did you wanna…?”

Yassen raised an enquiring eyebrow, then took in the state Alex was in and caught up.

“Oh.” Yassen switched his gaze from Alex’s obvious hard-on to his glass and Alex realised he was actually blushing. “Actually, would you mind, if...” he hesitated. “If we took it a little more slowly?”

Alex blinked. “Oh. Uh, yeah, I guess. I mean, of course.” He started to sit up and move away, afraid he was screwing things up by being too pushy, but to his relief Yassen pulled him back against his side and hugged him.

“Thank you,” Yassen said quietly. “And I didn’t mean to imply there was anything wrong with wanting it.”

Alex kissed him on the jawline, relaxing against his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he murmured. “Just spray me with water or something if I get too frisky.” He smirked. “You’re not waiting for marriage are you? Because I’m not committed to a spring wedding. In fact we could be in Vegas by tomorrow.”

Yassen shook his head, looking fondly exasperated. Alex grinned at him. It was an expression Yassen seemed to reserve solely for him, and it wasn’t an unfamiliar one. Actually, the more Alex thought about it, Yassen had quite a few expressions he only ever seemed to use on him. 

Alex had the sudden feeling that he’d been rather blind, for quite some time. He reached out and took Yassen’s hand. 

“I’m not joking you know. I mean, okay, I am, about the wedding thing, but – I’m not just screwing around. I want this. I want you. To be with you. This isn’t – an impulse thing, I suppose is what I’m saying. Badly. Um.”

Yassen studied him, then raised Alex’s hand to his lips and kissed his knuckles, before turning his hand over and pressing a more lingering kiss to the inside of his palm. Alex felt a jolt of heat shoot straight to his groin and swallowed hard. 

“Just to be clear.” Alex cleared his throat. “You were okay with the kissing part, right?”

In answer, Yassen pulled him in close again, and Alex gave a moan of relief.

–

Two weeks later they were back in Alex’s apartment in London. It had been an eventful fortnight, involving their plane out of Bolivia being unexpectedly hijacked and then re-hijacked as soon as Yassen got thoroughly pissed off with his plans being disrupted. 

The cabin crew had been grateful if somewhat confused, and the pair of them had had to subsequently break out of the detention centre where they’d been sent for questioning.

All of which meant it hadn’t been the most conventionally romantic of beginnings to their relationship, although Alex privately thought lying pressed together for warmth under a thorn bush in the cold desert night whilst hiding from pursuit was actually up there, and suspected Yassen did too. They were never going to be the most ordinary of couples. 

But it had been a busy time, and there had been plenty of kisses and touches and embraces in between, and it hadn’t struck Alex up to now that they hadn’t actually had sex yet. Now though they were out of harm’s way and with time to themselves, and had spent a pleasant evening just eating and drinking and talking and were snuggled on Alex’s sofa with the last of the wine.

“So...are you going to stay here tonight?” Alex ventured as the clock neared midnight, letting his hand slide over the curve of Yassen’s leg, dipping between his thighs. 

“I should really go home,” Yassen said slowly. Alex’s hand stopped its upward journey, but remained possessively on his leg. 

“We don’t have to do anything. You could just stay,” Alex offered. “Please? It’d be nice. And it’s late, and you’re tired, and I’ll be cold if you go.”

Yassen gave a quiet laugh. “Fine.”

“Really?” Alex looked hopeful and his hand crept north again, fingertips just skimming the line of Yassen’s dick through his jeans. 

“Really. Although...” Yassen looked conflicted and Alex withdrew his hand. 

“Right. Sorry.”

“Don’t be.” Yassen reached after the hand and held it between both of his. “Don’t apologise for wanting more. I should be the one apologising.”

“Don’t be daft.” Alex shook his head. “I get it, you’re old-school and I’m just a big tart. It’s no problem. I can wait.”

“It’s not – ” Yassen broke off. “It’s not that.”

Alex stood up and drew Yassen up after him. “Tell me in bed.”

–

They’d seen each other naked plenty of times. Getting changed, patching up wounds, one eventful escape from a police station in Nevada. They’d certainly spent too long around each other to be particularly self-conscious about nudity, so when Alex noticed Yassen had kept his boxer shorts on, he stopped in the act of pulling his own down and left them where they were.

If Yassen was leaving his pants on it was clearly to signal a point, and while Alex wasn’t sure why he was so reticent about them sleeping together, he had no wish to make him uncomfortable. He assumed they would get there eventually, and in the meantime he was just glad they were together. It was more than he’d ever dared hope for.

Once they were both in bed, Yassen certainly showed no hesitation at taking Alex into his arms and Alex kissed him enthusiastically. 

It didn’t take long before Alex was hard and he tried to wriggle away surreptitiously, not wanting Yassen to notice. As if anything ever escaped the man’s attention. 

“Alex. It’s okay,” Yassen murmured. “I don’t mind.”

“Sorry.” Alex went red. “You seem to have an unfortunate effect on me.”

Yassen smiled. “I wouldn’t say it was unfortunate. And I don’t want you to think it’s not reciprocated.”

Alex automatically looked down and then winced, because could he get any more obvious? But Yassen at least did appear to have an erection as well, which was encouraging. 

“I do want you Alex,” Yassen promised quietly, apparently reading his mind. “It’s just...”

“What?” Alex shifted position so he was sitting next to Yassen instead, and pulled the duvet up over them. “You can tell me,” he said, reaching for Yassen’s hand. “Whatever it is, you can tell me.”

Yassen smiled at him. “It’s nothing bad,” he said. “Just...odd, perhaps. Or you might think so.”

Alex just looked at him, waiting expectantly, and Yassen sighed.

“Fine. I just – haven’t. Before. With anyone.” 

Alex stared at him. “You haven’t – what, had sex?”

“No.”

“At all?”

“No.”

“With anyone?”

Yassen gave him an exasperated look. “Not with anyone else being present, at least.”

Alex snickered. “Always knew you were a wanker.” He leaned in and kissed Yassen on the mouth. “You’re serious?”

“Hardly the kind of thing I’m going to make up, is it?”

“Well, no, but...” Alex belatedly realised Yassen was actually embarrassed, and squeezed his hand. “Fuck, sorry, I didn’t mean to push you into this. Would you rather we didn’t – ” he was on the brink of scrambling out of the bed again, and Yassen reeled him back.

“Alex. Stop panicking. I am fully capable of making my own decisions, and right now there’s nowhere else I would rather be.” 

“Oh. Right. Good. You’re sure?” 

Yassen pulled him closer and kissed him. 

“Convinced?” he whispered, some considerable time later.

“Yeah.” Alex blinked dazedly at him, and smiled. “So – why haven’t you? If you don’t mind me asking? I mean – if you’d rather not say, it’s fine. It’s none of my business. I mean why shouldn’t – ” 

Yassen shut him up by kissing him again, and Alex spluttered with laughter against his lips. 

Yassen settled back, Alex’s hand in his, and considered his words. “I knew pretty early on that I was gay,” he said. “Early teens. But – it was Russia. If you think it’s bad now, back then – it wasn’t the sort of thing you would ever bring up. You just – didn’t. Certainly not where I lived. My world kind’ve imploded before I had to think about how the future might have played out for me, but the best I could have hoped for was remaining alone, or perhaps a sympathetic marriage to someone with their own reasons for not wanting me to bother them in that way.”

“Shit,” said Alex, quietly and with a lot of feeling. 

“But then – everything else happened. And I found myself out in a wider world with a lot more opportunities and a more forgiving view of a young man with such tendencies.” He paused. “It took me a while longer, to forgive them in myself.” 

Alex shuffled closer, nuzzling a kiss into Yassen’s neck and resting his head on his shoulder, wanting to offer comfort without interrupting. He felt Yassen squeeze his fingers. 

“And then I met – someone.” Yassen hesitated. “Who rather made me face what I was feeling head on.”

Alex looked up when he didn’t continue, and snorted. “If it was my father, you can say you know.”

Yassen gave him a guilty smile. “It was. I was – rather in love with him.”

Alex rolled his eyes. “Well he clearly didn’t bend you over the nearest gondola or we wouldn’t be having this conversation. He fucked you over, and not in a fun way. I know that much.”

“Am I boring you?” Yassen asked dryly. 

“No!” Alex sat up, looking uncomfortable. “I just – I knew he hurt you. But I never realised it had been in that way. Did he know? How you felt?”

“Looking back, he must have,” Yassen admitted. “I thought I was being discreet, but with the benefit of hindsight – I think the phrase I would use is probably embarrassingly obvious.” 

“Fuck.” Alex looked sad, and Yassen nudged him with his shoulder. 

“You can hardly prefer the alternative.”

“No but – I just hate the idea of him hurting you on purpose. How could he be so cruel to someone who cared about him?”

“He taught me many things,” Yassen sighed. “Not all of them the ones he intended. Whatever, the result was I found myself extremely reluctant to love like that again. I never trusted anyone enough to let them get close. And then, later – my life being what it was – how could I?”

Alex studied Yassen’s face, his heart aching for him. 

“You don’t have to love someone to go to bed with them though,” was what actually came out of his mouth, and Yassen’s lips twitched up in a smile. 

“I thought we were talking about my love life, not yours.”

“Hey!” Alex gave a guilty smirk. His sexual history was mostly one of anonymous hook-ups and one night stands, and he belatedly realised why Yassen might have been wary of getting involved with him at first. 

How could he even begin to explain he’d only gone chasing meaningless sex because his heart had already been given to someone he didn’t think would ever want it?

“I’m sorry.” Yassen smiled. “I’m not judging. In a way I wish I’d had your balls.”

“You’re welcome to them now,” Alex said before he could stop himself, and was relieved when Yassen laughed.

“You’re very kind.” Yassen’s lips were curving in the kind of lazy smile that made Alex start to get hard all over again and he cleared his throat. 

“So, you were saying. No – like – hook-ups or anything? You must have had offers.” 

“I suppose.” Yassen shook his head. “It never seemed worth the risk. In the end it was just easier not to think about it. I could jerk off when I needed to. It dealt with the physical need and it was a lot less complicated.” 

“Sex isn’t always about the sex though,” Alex said, then frowned. “If you see what I mean.”

“And you’ve circled back round from one-night-stands,” Yassen pointed out. “I didn’t want to be in the position of lying to someone about who I was. What I was. And who could have ever loved me knowing the truth?”

“Me,” Alex said under his breath. “I could. I do. I love you Yassen.”

Yassen looked at him with an almost frozen expression, his eyes searching Alex’s face. 

“Do you mean that?” he asked, rather hoarsely. 

“Of course I mean it. Fucking hell, I – I always have.” The words just slipped out and Alex bit his lip, but he held Yassen’s gaze defensively.

“Alex.” This time it was barely more than a breath, Yassen’s fingers ghosting over Alex’s face. “God, I – ” 

“Yassen? What is it?”

“I love you too.” 

It wasn’t the words, it was the fact Yassen’s voice was shaking as he said them. Alex gathered him into his arms and held him tightly against his chest. 

“I love you,” Alex said again, more firmly this time. “I love you Yassen and whatever happens, I swear, I will never hurt you like he did. I will never hurt you in any way, ever. Okay?”

He felt Yassen nod against him, as if he didn’t trust himself to speak, and Alex held him tighter still. 

“Fuck.” Alex pressed his face into Yassen’s hair and kissed him. “Fuck.”

This time he felt Yassen laugh, and smiled against his hair. “Or not fuck, I suppose.” Alex pulled back a little and looked at him. “We don’t have to. Have sex, I mean. Like, ever, if you don’t want to. I don’t mind, if you’d rather not? I’m happy with whatever you want.”

Yassen smiled at him. “Alex, I do want to. I want you, in every way possible.”

Alex grinned. “That might take a while. We should maybe get cracking.” Pleased when it made Yassen laugh again. “You don’t – mind, do you?” he added a little uncertainly. “That I’ve – you know. Fucked around a bit?”

“Of course not.” Yassen looked surprised, then smiled again. “You can show me what to do.”

“I’m fairly sure you know what to do.”

“There’s a big difference between theory and practice.” Yassen gave Alex a sideways look. “I might be no good?”

Alex cackled. “You’ve never been bad at anything in your life. I have every confidence in you.”

Yassen gave a non-committal hum, then smiled. “On the plus side, I certainly appreciate the value of practising a skill until I get it right.”

They settled down in each other’s arms, needing to be touching each other right now. 

“So – what do you want to do?” Alex asked, his mind turning to the possibilities and practical matters. “I don’t mean right now. I mean – generally. In terms of like – do you want to fuck me? Or do you want me to fuck you?”

“Do you have a preference?” Yassen asked. Alex shook his head. 

“Not really. I’m easy.” Alex winced. “So to speak. Forget I said that.”

Yassen gave a low laugh. “I know what you meant. And for the record, I would like to try both, if you are happy with that.”

“I don’t think words can fully express how happy I am with that,” Alex grinned. “Although if you could see the state of my crotch right now, that might go some way to illustrating things.”

Yassen’s hand disappeared under the duvet, and a second later Alex’s eyes widened as he felt warm fingers stroking his cock through his boxers. 

“Holy shit.” He didn’t know why he was surprised, Yassen was hardly one to do things by halves once he’d made up his mind. 

Alex bucked unashamedly into the teasing pressure. “Touch me,” he begged eventually, realising Yassen might actually be waiting for permission to do anything more. 

Yassen’s hand obligingly dipped inside his waistband, coming to close around Alex’s hot shaft with a firmness that Alex heartily approved of.

“Fuck. Yes. God.” After all this time, after literally years of fantasising about it, Yassen was actually jerking him off. He wasn’t even dreaming. Although he might have died and gone to heaven.

Yassen was lying alongside him, head propped up on one hand, the other moving between his legs. Alex shoved the duvet back, partly so he didn’t make a mess on it but mostly so he could see Yassen’s hand working him. 

Alex writhed under his touch, enjoying it to the utmost but also feeling faintly guilty that he might have made Yassen feel he had to do this. He wrenched his eyes away from the mesmerising sight of Yassen’s fingers curled around his cock and looked up into his face. Yassen smiled down at him, so clearly appreciating the sight of Alex coming apart that he immediately relaxed. 

“Good?” Yassen murmured, although the noises Alex was making left little room for doubt.

“Fuck yes.” Alex arched his back, loving the draw and pull of Yassen’s hand, feeling it taking him closer and closer to the edge. 

“You look so beautiful, like that.” 

Somehow Yassen’s few quiet words were the thing that made Alex lose all last vestiges of control, and despite the fact he’d been determined to make this moment last as long as possible he found himself losing his load all over his stomach and chest.

“Fuck. Sorry,” Alex panted, and Yassen laughed.

“I might be as pure as the driven snow but I’m fairly sure that’s what’s supposed to happen.”

Alex wriggled out of his boxers and used them to wipe himself down. 

“Hmmn. Yes, I can see you as a snowdrift. Cold, deadly...” He grinned and gave Yassen a lingering kiss. “Well. Maybe not that cold...”

“Not to you,” Yassen smiled. 

“So, uh – do I get to return the favour?” Alex asked, trailing his fingers down Yassen’s stomach, but slowly enough that he could stop before reaching his groin if Yassen wanted him to.

In answer, Yassen reached down and worked his underwear down over his hips, letting his erection spring free. Alex gave him a somewhat feral smile and wrapped his hand around it. 

“Is this okay?” Alex checked quietly.

“Very much so.”

“Has anyone else ever touched you like this?” Alex asked as he started stroking him gently. He knew that just because Yassen hadn’t had full sex it didn’t mean he’d never been intimate with anyone at all, but from the way he’d been talking it had sounded unlikely. 

Yassen shook his head. “No. You are the first.” He smiled. “Other than me.”

“Tell me if you want it different,” Alex said. “Harder, or slower, or whatever.”

“Little harder, would be good,” Yassen murmured, then caught his breath when Alex did as he asked, pressing his shoulders down into the mattress and letting a quiet moan escape him, his hips canting up, pushing his cock through Alex’s fist.

“Fuck,” Alex whispered, catching his lower lip between his teeth as he watched Yassen come slowly undone under the increasingly vigorous ministrations of his hand.

He stroked him hard and fast, until finally Yassen was spilling all over his belly with a heartfelt groan of approval.

Alex cleaned him up, wanting suddenly to look after him, and heady with the fact that Yassen was letting him. 

“How was that?” Alex whispered as they lay down again in each other’s arms to go to sleep, this time entirely naked. 

“I think I could definitely get used to this whole sex thing,” Yassen murmured, and smiled when Alex giggled.

“Seriously though,” Alex said, interlacing their fingers. “If there’s anything you don’t want to do, we don’t have to. You will tell me right? I mean, you might not know you don’t like something until we start doing it.”

“Alex, I’m inexperienced, not incapable. But thank you,” Yassen kissed him, but Alex pulled back and held his gaze steadily.

“I mean it. I know you. Don’t you dare just lie there and endure something you’re hating because you think you have to, or because you think I’m into it. Talk to me, yeah? Tell me what you’re liking, what you’re not liking. I want this to be good for you.”

Yassen’s expression softened as he took in the intent look on Alex’s face. “I promise,” he said quietly. 

Alex snuggled up close again. “I love you,” he mumbled sleepily. “But sometimes you really do need telling.”

Yassen hid his smile in Alex’s hair. The fact that Alex was the only person on earth who had never been shy about telling Yassen exactly what he thought at any given point was one of the things he loved about him. Although, despite the fact it was a night for confidences, sharing that particular one might be unwise.

–

Their plans for anything more adventurous the following night were interrupted by Yassen receiving a call in the morning and immediately needing to disappear off on a solo job he’d been waiting to hear about.

Alex knew what that meant. Yassen took on very little assassination work these days, but sometimes something came along that was either challenging or well-paid enough to be worth his attention, and he would go off on his own for a while.

Alex himself preferred not to take lives unless it was in defence of others and unavoidable, and there was plenty of other work out there for two competent men with a high skill set and negotiable ethics. 

He understood Yassen wanting to maintain his reputation though, and was also grateful that Yassen never tried to involve him in it or tell him the details. Yassen would make discreet references to a solo job and slip away for a few days, always turning up again as if nothing had happened. 

Alex had always tried not to mind before, but this was the first time he’d got to kiss him goodbye, and he watched Yassen disappear into the London drizzle with a tight feeling in his stomach.

Things would change, he realised. He hadn’t thought they would, given they’d both apparently been feeling the same way all this time, but the pretence of neutrality was very different from openly loving someone and knowing you were loved back. They would undoubtedly still work together, but Alex was slowly realising the dynamic would inevitably be different from now on. They would be closer, for one thing. Mission debriefs in the same bed certainly sounded a lot more appealing.

–

Ten increasingly anxious days later he finally got a text. _Vienna tomorrow?_ It was an unknown number, but he smiled in relief. Texted back _I’ll be there_ , and immediately logged on to buy a plane ticket.

Yassen’s Vienna apartment was on the fourth floor of a period building in a quiet but stylish street near the summer palace. As he mounted the stairs, Alex found he had butterflies in his stomach like he hadn’t had for years. It was ridiculous, he felt like a kid with a crush more than a twenty-two year old who’d seen some shit. 

Yassen opened the door to his knock, and Alex felt his nerves evaporate on the spot at the sight of his smile. 

“Hey.” Alex stepped inside, and into his arms. 

“Hey yourself.” Yassen hugged him close, then kissed him. Alex gave him a goofy smile whilst checking him over for any sign of injury, surreptitiously at first, then realising he could just do it openly now. He had every confidence in Yassen’s abilities, but that never stopped him worrying about what might happen when he wasn’t there to guard his back. The fact that he could finally acknowledge that worry openly was a weight off in itself. 

“I’m fine,” Yassen assured him, seeing his scrutiny and guessing his thoughts. 

“No problems?”

“All straightforward.” 

“Ten days isn’t straightforward.”

Yassen stopped halfway across the room and looked round at him. “You don’t normally want details,” he said carefully. “And you don’t normally worry this much.”

“I always worry this much!” Alex blurted, then went red. 

“Oh.” Yassen looked taken aback. “I see. I’m – sorry?”

Alex sighed. “Look, I know you can take care of yourself. I just hate the not knowing.”

Yassen crossed back over to him and took Alex’s hands into his. “If it helps, I have no further plans for anything that doesn’t involve you.”

“Really?” 

“Not one.”

“I thought you had something in October?”

“I turned it down.” 

Alex looked up in shock. “You never go back on a commitment?”

“There is plenty of time for them to find a replacement. And no money had changed hands yet.” Yassen hesitated. “I know you don’t like me doing it.”

Alex’s look of dumbfounded shock deepened. “You cancelled it for me?”

“Yes.” 

“But – why?”

“I should have thought that was obvious, no?”

Alex opened and closed his mouth a few times. “But – that’s so – _sweet_.” 

Yassen’s face creased into a smile at his astonishment. “If we are going to make a go of this, together? I figured the least I could do was stop doing the one thing I know you hate.”

“Oh my God.” Alex drew him in closer. “You really do love me.”

“Were you in any doubt?”

“No. But – this is – Yassen, I – ”

Words had failed him, so Yassen kissed him instead. “I couldn’t get out of this one, but you have my word it was the last. Whatever we do now we do together. Assuming you don’t have any objection to continuing to work with me?”

“Of course I bloody don’t!” Alex followed him into the kitchen. “What else d’you expect me to do, stay home and take up knitting?”

“No.” Yassen handed him a drink and slid a proprietorial arm around his waist. “There is no one else I would rather work with.” He kissed him. “Or be with, come to that.”

Alex put the glass straight down again and kissed him back, pushing him up against the counter. Yassen, who was entirely capable of beating Alex in all forms of unarmed combat, let himself be pinned, and wrapped his arms around Alex’s neck with a hum of appreciation.

Alex’s mouth was insistent against his, and Yassen could feel he was already hard. He lowered his hands to Alex’s waist and pulled him in against him. Alex gave a quiet grunt of surprise, then took the hint and started grinding against him until Yassen was as hard as he was.

When they broke off from kissing this time they were both breathing rather heavily, and Alex gave Yassen a smile that was equal parts hungry and adoring. 

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” Alex coaxed.

“I’m thinking...” Yassen tipped his head back and looked at Alex speculatively. “That you should probably take me to bed.”

–

There was something about getting into bed in the afternoon that added an extra frisson to proceedings. Yassen’s bedroom faced south, and the room was full of warm light as they sprawled naked in the bed together.

For a long time they did little more than kiss, each learning the other’s lines and textures, worshipping with hands and mouths. Alex found a yellowing bruise on Yassen’s upper arm and pressed his lips to it protectively.

“I missed you,” he whispered, the feeling of Yassen’s arms so securely round his waist finally letting him say it. 

“I missed you too,” Yassen replied, without hesitation. “It was spectacularly bad timing, I’m sorry.”

“Still.” Alex stretched languorously in his arms and kissed his way across Yassen’s chest. “This was worth waiting for, right?”

“Rather a long time, in my case.”

Alex smiled. He shifted until he was looking down at Yassen, fingers tracing his cheekbone. “Tell me what you want.” 

Yassen gazed up at him. “I think – I would like for you to be in control,” he said softly. “In charge of me. Make love to me, Alex.” 

Alex pressed a kiss to his lips, sweet and reverent. “God, I love you.” He moved back, giving Yassen space to sit up against the pillows. 

“You will find anything you might need in the drawer,” Yassen said and Alex promptly snickered.

“Have you been shopping?” 

“Possibly.” Yassen smiled. “Although I suspect if I also looked in your bag...”

Alex went scarlet. “Maybe. Probably.” He thought it was highly unfair that of the two of them he was the one blushing over condoms and lube, but Yassen had always been extremely practical. 

They’d both been hard for some time by now and he took Yassen’s cock into his hand, stroking him with pleasure. This was still so new, for both of them, being together in this way. Alex was determined not to take a single second of it for granted, and also to make it as good as humanly possible for Yassen. 

On impulse he leaned over and took Yassen into his mouth, sucking down on him with a slow heat that immediately produced a groan from Yassen’s lips.

Alex smiled around him, his hands splayed on Yassen’s thighs, head bobbing over his lap with a steady rhythm.

“Alex.” Yassen sounded strained and Alex raised one hand vaguely above his head in a thumbs-up gesture without taking his attention away from what he was doing. 

He felt more than heard Yassen’s laugh, noting with satisfaction the way Yassen started thrusting between his lips and had clearly correctly interpreted his gesture as permission to come. 

Sure enough it wasn’t much longer before Alex was swallowing around him greedily, then licking him clean and crawling back up to kiss him. 

“Well that was unexpected,” Yassen said, sounding a mixture of pleased, amused and gratifyingly unsteady. 

Alex smirked. “I thought if you’d come at least once first you’d be more relaxed.”

“How thoughtful.” Yassen kissed him back, laughing. “And, well, on the grounds I refuse to be outdone...” He bent over Alex’s lap in turn. 

His mouth was warm and soft and Alex’s shameless groans were a lot louder than Yassen’s had been. 

Alex hadn’t expected this, would certainly never have demanded it in return, but Yassen hadn’t even hesitated. He was careful and precise, exploring his limits, never going so far as to choke himself and Alex had a momentary flashback to his own first time when he’d been a drooling, coughing, retching mess, and was both amused and indignant. Of course Yassen would approach it methodically. 

That wasn’t to say it felt at all clinical either, because Alex was already unravelling at pace. Yassen had adopted a technique of essentially jerking Alex off into his mouth, and Alex was in the grip of toe-curling ecstasy. But at the same time he did spare a thought to wonder what it would take to make Yassen fall apart, to crack his control and make him act on instinct rather than reason, make him gasp and shake and moan – and whether he could do it. It was that mental image as much as anything that make Alex come, spurting suddenly into Yassen’s mouth without warning. 

Yassen sat up, and visibly made himself swallow. His expression wasn’t impressed and Alex giggled.

“How was it?”

“A taste sensation,” said Yassen weakly.

“That bad huh?”

“I think it might be an acquired taste.”

“Are you planning to acquire it?”

“I’m planning on a lot of things,” Yassen said, and pulled him into a kiss. Alex could taste himself on his tongue, and licked into his mouth eagerly. 

When they’d sorted themselves out again Alex went diving in the bedside drawer and brought out the things he’d need. 

Alex hesitated, then looked up at him. “I don’t think I’ve ever taken someone’s virginity before,” he admitted. “It’s kind’ve terrifying.”

Yassen smiled. “I have every confidence in you.” He lay back, knees drawn up, feet flat on the mattress watching Alex get down to business.

Alex squeezed the lube into his palm to warm it, slicking his fingers thoroughly. Yassen parted his legs without having to be asked and Alex grinned at the knowing look he gave him. There was something reassuring about the way Yassen was so matter-of-fact about everything. The fact that Alex could see he was already half-hard again didn’t hurt, either. 

He leaned in and let a finger stroke over Yassen’s hole, working the tip gently inside. Yassen slid deeper on the bed, pushing his hips up to give Alex better access, eyes fixed on his face. Alex was so intent on what he was doing he was almost frowning, and Yassen held back a laugh. 

Alex’s middle finger was some way inside him by now, and when he looked up to check everything was okay he almost jumped to find Yassen watching him. Alex gave him a faintly embarrassed smile. 

“Alright?”

“So far so good.”

Alex spluttered with laughter and deliberately jabbed his finger in deeper. Yassen grunted in surprise and Alex smirked at him. 

“Better be nice to me.”

“Or what?” 

Alex worked his finger in and out a little faster, noticing Yassen’s breath speed up at the same time. After a while he added more lube and a second finger, then a third, working him wetly open. He pushed deeper, leaning over and curling his fingers inside him, and caught the moment Yassen tensed all over in surprise and sucked in a breath.

“Oh.” 

“Just there, huh?” Alex whispered.

“Just – yes – there.” The words were panted out one to a breath as Alex’s fingers repeatedly found the same spot. Yassen was fully erect and leaking on his stomach by now, and Alex had to resist the urge to take him into his mouth again and just finger fuck him to completion. He had to remember they had time to do everything. Concentrate on the thing Yassen had asked for.

Alex sat up and withdrew his fingers. He was painfully hard himself, from the quiet noises Yassen was making as much as anything. The knowledge that Yassen was letting him do this, trusted him enough to do this, was heady in itself, but to know that Yassen was genuinely getting off on it was the ultimate turn-on.

“Ready?” Alex asked.

“I’ve been ready for some time, to be honest.”

“I just don’t want to hurt you!”

“You’re adorable.”

“Shut up.”

“Alex. I’m ready. I promise.” Yassen pulled him closer for a kiss and murmured against his lips. “Fuck me.”

Alex wiped his hand then reached for a condom, conscious of Yassen’s eyes on him as he rolled it on. He supposed the fact Yassen had already swallowed a load of his come made this a bit of a technicality, and he was careful to get regular tests in any case, but – well maybe that was a conversation they could have later. Alex knew he no longer wanted to go with anyone else. Did _Yassen_ understand that? He looked up again suddenly worried, to find Yassen smiling at him.

“Alex, I don’t know what’s going through your head right now but watching your face is a journey in itself,” he said. 

“Sorry.” Alex smiled back ruefully. “Just over-thinking.”

Yassen sat up again, leaned forward and kissed him. “No more thinking. That’s an order.”

Alex’s smile widened. “I don’t have to call you sir in bed do I?”

“Given that you’ve never called me that in the field either, I find it unlikely.”

Alex laughed, and pushed Yassen back down on the bed. “Shut up and spread ‘em.”

Yassen obliged, making Alex laugh harder. He crawled over Yassen until he could kiss him again, sprawling on top of him, his rubber-clad cock sliding against Yassen’s bare one. 

Finally he sat back and slicked himself up thoroughly, adjusting Yassen’s position and lining himself up. Pushed in, slow and sure, watching intently as his cock disappeared inside, stretching Yassen open.

Looked up to find Yassen’s eyes on him, a little wider than they had been, his chest rising and falling unevenly. 

“Does it hurt?”

“A little,” Yassen admitted, having promised he’d be honest. 

“Do you want me to – ”

“No I do not want you to stop,” Yassen interrupted, and Alex laughed. 

“Okay. Just checking.”

Alex took him at his word and shunted the rest of the way in until he was buried to the balls in Yassen’s tight hot body. 

He settled forwards until he could lie in Yassen’s arms, thrusting shallowly, giving Yassen time to acclimatise.

“Does it feel good yet?” Alex asked hopefully. 

“Getting there. Definitely getting there,” came the rather breathless reply. Alex was encouraged by the fact Yassen’s cock was hard as a rock pressed against his belly, and that even if the lines of Yassen’s face were a little tight, his eyes had never left Alex and he was gazing up at him in something like wonder.

Alex risked thrusting a little harder, watching Yassen closely for any signs of discomfort, but this time Yassen’s eyes fluttered shut, his lips parting in a silent groan. 

Alex continued like this for some time, letting himself get into it now that Yassen seemed to be enjoying himself. After a while he shifted position again, pushing himself up a little with his hands braced on Yassen’s shoulders. He could fuck deeper like this, and Yassen too was rocking against him now, hips moving in time with Alex’s thrusts, driving himself onto Alex’s cock. 

“Fuck.” It was Alex who gasped it, the sensations of fucking Yassen so hard had brought him close to his own climax and he had to pull out for a second, grasping the base of his cock and breathing hard.

“Alex, you are allowed to come you know,” Yassen murmured delightedly, stretching and wriggling into a more comfortable position.

“Fuck no!” Alex objected. “This is your maiden voyage and you get to come first.” He grinned. “I make no promises after this. Fuck, you make me want to come though.”

“There are more fucks in your mouth than my body right now,” Yassen pointed out. “Come back down here and finish the job.”

It made Alex laugh again and he did as he was told, sliding back into Yassen’s body with a smooth roll of his hips. 

Yassen let his head fall back, relaxing into it now, letting himself enjoy the feeling of Alex inside him. He hadn’t been sure what to expect, but Alex’s combination of loving care and occasional wild enthusiasm was both reassuring and unpredictable enough to defy any preconceptions he might have had. 

There’d been precious few people in his life that he’d trusted, and fewer still who hadn’t ended up letting him down, but here, now, with Alex, Yassen finally felt he could let himself be vulnerable. 

He’d felt faintly guilty about dragging Alex to Vienna when he could just as easily have gone back to London, but he’d wanted the safety of his own apartment around him, familiar surroundings that he knew for certain were secure. And Alex had said nothing, just dropped everything and come to him. Yassen knew he was bad at telling Alex how much he appreciated him, and hoped he could make himself change in that regard.

He was certainly appreciating him right now. Alex’s cock was hot and thick inside him and Yassen had gone from tensing uncertainly around the strange sensation to actively trying to fuck himself harder on it. Alex seemed to pick up on his reaction and redoubled his earlier efforts to apparently try and pound Yassen right through the mattress. 

Alex could feel the change in him, feel the way Yassen was shuddering beneath him and knew he was close. He slowed, sliding his hands under him and lifting slightly, fucking into him now with a deep slow stroke.

By now they were both slick with sweat, their bodies bathed in the deepening golden hue of late afternoon. Yassen wrapped a hand around his own cock for the first time, closing his eyes and arching his back as he pulled himself the last fraction of the way. 

Alex got to watch him come apart, Yassen’s release spurting up his chest in violent pulses as he spasmed around Alex’s cock. Alex couldn’t hold on a second longer and as soon as Yassen had opened his eyes, panting hard, Alex let himself fall forward into his arms shuddering with an orgasm that felt like it might never end.

Eventually, and with a certain amount of groaning, they untangled themselves. Alex pulled out carefully and disposed of the condom before cleaning them both up. 

“Was that okay?” Alex asked when they were settled comfortably together once more. He was reasonably confident that Yassen had given a good impression of a man having the time of his life, but there was still a streak of nerves that made him ask.

“That was a lot more than okay. That was incredible,” Yassen assured him, kissing him appreciatively. “Thank you, Alex. So much.” 

“Beats jerking off huh?”

“I think you might be right.” 

“Only think?” Alex asked with mock indignance. 

“Ask me in the morning when I can’t walk.”

Alex snickered. “Sorry. Was I too rough?”

“You were perfect.” 

“Be honest. Were you nervous before?”

Alex was teasing, but Yassen appeared to seriously consider the question. 

“I think nervous would be the wrong word,” he said slowly. “But when you avoid doing a thing for so long, it perhaps assumes a greater weight in your mind than it deserves. It turns into an obstacle to be overcome, rather than something to be anticipated. So you just avoid it harder than ever.” He cupped Alex’s face in one hand, stroked a thumb across his cheek. “What I’m saying is, I don’t think I could have done this with anyone other than you Alex.”

Alex swallowed a sudden lump in his throat, and kissed him. 

“You’re definitely up for round two then?”

Yassen smiled. “You might have to give me a minute. I’m older than you.”

“I didn’t mean right now!” Alex spluttered, laughing. 

Yassen pulled him closer with something close to a grin. 

“Oh, I did.” 

–


End file.
